maychorian | The America Song

I'm going to post something serious later today, but here, have a frivolous video that makes me grin like an idiot.

Whitest Kids U Know are either really, really funny, or they totally miss the boat. (Some of their sketches have rape humor, for instance, and that will never not make me sick to my stomach.) But when they're on, they're on, and this is one of those. I have all three seasons on my Netflix instant queue right now so I can watch them with my Roku player, and every time I think about taking them off the queue I change my mind and watch a random episode instead.

This should be of particular interest to the slashers on my flist. Country Singers/America OTP.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXIGwiVg8s0

Well I got in my car
And went down to the bar
To relax from a full working day
And while drinking my beer
I happened to hear
This New York banker-type say

That our country’s all wrong
And that we don’t belong
In affairs that are so far away
So I pushed back my chair
And I stood up right there
And made sure the whole bar heard me say

I’m totally gay for America
I’m totally gay for the US of A

From the East to the West
From the North to the South
I’d gladly bend down
And take Florida in my mouth

I’d tongue kiss Mt. Rushmore
And drop my pants to my waist
Then take the Washington Monument
All the way to its base

There ain’t a lot of things that make me feel this way
But this country of mine makes me totally gay
Now I know things ain’t right
‘Cause on the news every night
And in the papers almost everyday

I wanna hug Uncle Sam
Caress his hair with my hand and
Let him know everything is okay

Maybe give him a quick peck
At the nape of his neck
And rub his shoulders ‘til his cares went away

Trace the curves of his thighs
And look into his eyes
And see if he wants to go hit the hay

‘Cause I’m totally gay for America
I’m totally gay for the US of A

I know we could never get married
But he’d never ask me anyway
‘Cause it would undermine the family
I know that’s what he’d say

But we could keep it a secret
And continue on that way
And I’d be faithful and loyal
‘Til he threw me away
There ain’t a lot of things that make me feel this way
But this country of mine makes me totally gay