maychorian (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
maychorian) wrote2012-02-17 01:19 am
maychorian) wrote2012-02-17 01:19 am
Entry tags:
TV Round Up and Bad Eye Days
Cannot decide if I love or hate the new Glee character.
'Kay, so I was homeschooled. I grew up conservative Christian. I'm Libertarian now, but those are my roots. Homeschooled kid in dreadlocks who is obviously Ryan Murphy's idea of a cool (if bizarre) version of Christianity? Down with it. Also down with the kid's decision at the end of the episode. I made the same one, after all.
Still can't help wondering if it's pandering, though. My current Libertarian self is kind of amazed that they didn't go the easy route and make him a snotty, cliched Christian antagonist for all the gay people on this show. (So many gay people on this show.) I'm truly impressed that they chose such an interesting characterization for a homeschooled character. He is apparently some sort of Christian-hippy Libertarian type, which I am down with. As mentioned. I'd be as smitten as Quinn is, truly.
But I'm glad my parents don't watch this show (as if they EVER would), because I know what it would look like to them. Another attempt to whitewash religious beliefs and never, ever have a Christian with any sort of firm convictions anywhere on TV. Which...he maybe sort of is. Accepting homosexuality is, of course, the "cool" thing to do.
Of course Glee would never take the braver, more interesting route of trying to create a sympathetic character who shows love to all those around him but also believes personally in a different morality. As most conservative Christians really, truly do, no matter what caricatures you've seen. My parents may never believe that homosexuality is not wrong, but they would also never condone bullying or abuse or even impoliteness to gay people, either. You'll never see a character like that, though, just either cool Christians who accept everything as easily as Joe did, or ugly, villainous Bible-thumpers who do their utmost to ruin everything for everyone. (Like, say, Quinn's dad.)
So, yeah. Conflicted. I accept that Glee is a leftist fairy tale. It has been from the first episode. But as always, it's when something rubs up against my personal experience that I get seriously uncomfortable. Despite where I am now, I remember where I've been, you know?
Rule of thumb should always be, though, to never, ever expect Glee to take anything but the easy road. That, too, has been true from day one.
RAISING HOPE.
Jimmy is such a sweetheart. Took 'em long enough, but they made it. ♥ I can't remember the last time I was so satisfied to see an on-screen kiss, if I ever was.
And Virginia and Burt and their search for a hobby was adorable and awesome. It was adorawesome. I was kind of hoping that their hobby would be always-looking-for-hobbies, because I wanted it to go on FOREVER.
Penelope Garcia... Just... Penelope Garcia. And Derek. You have me. Friendship or beyond. I'm with you all the way.
"PLANES CRASH." "AND APPARENTLY CLOWNS KILL." ♥
Good gravy and glory, but I'm glad Lori's gone. I wanted to like her, I want to like all characters on my shows, but I never did. She just... ugh. Block of wood. And it really showed up bad next to all of the other gorgeous, animated people on her "team." She might have been on the team, but she was never in their ohana. I just want to be sure that's clear. I sort of crazily loved that the episode ended with Steve kissing Catherine. They had more chemistry in their five scenes together than Steve and Lori ever had in all their episodes. Thank goodness TPTB caught on to this, and made it abundantly clear in that ending scene where Steve's affections lie (at least canonically. We all know who he REALLY loves).
I never wanted to be one of those fans who hated the new (or original) female character and ragged on her and hated her in every scene and fist-pumped when she left. I resisted being that fan with everything I had in me, I really did. I've never been that fan before. But I totally was with this character, on this show, and this is me fist-pumping up a storm. BYE, LORI. DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YA WHERE THE GOOD LORD SPLIT YA.
Also, Danny called Steve a "topper."
Oh, from the second to last episode? I want to point something out.
Ohana in concentric circles.
Also, I would like to point out that Danny's new family has GUNS. ::slow, Dean-like smile:: So any bad guys who want to mess with either of Danny's families would be well-advised to stay away.
I was viciously happy that Lori wasn't there for that scene. DANNY AND HIS OHANA. Also I thought Stan not being there was sort of symbolic, but that guy totally won me over forever, for good, when he said, "It's about Grace?" as if, yes, fine, Danny could shoot him, Danny could kill him, Danny could do whatever he had to do as long as it was about Grace, for Grace. That's a good daddy. Both of them.
Oh, Hawaii. How I wish to live on your tropical shores.
On a not-TV note, I had a scary experience this week. I've been noticing for awhile that my eyes seemed to be getting worse, but hadn't gone back to my eye doctor because there's not much they can do, you know? Keratoconus is keratoconus. My eyes are bad, they get worse, and probably someday my only option will be cornea transplants. Already my left eye is useless, with surgery being the only way to help out with that, but my right has been carrying the load. My right eye isn't great, either, but I've been coping. Well enough. I see multiple images all the time now, squint almost constantly when reading or working, and driving at night, is a seriously bad idea anymore. Like, a dangerously bad idea. Even in the day it's not the best idea, and I'm always super careful. But I was getting along.
Then on Monday morning I felt this incredibly bad pain in my right eye, and suddenly it wasn't seeing pretty much at all. I panicked. I panicked hard. My eye doctor told me long ago that if I ever felt a piercing pain in my eye, I should call them right away, since it might mean that the keratoconus had thinned my cornea enough to make it tear.
So yeah. Shaking and crying. At work. I called the eye place, all but crying on the phone. They said to come right over, they'd fit me in. My eyes were too blurry to see much at all. Called my mom to drive me there. So embarrassed and so scared. What if my eyes were like this from now on? What if I needed surgery? How was I going to work, write, watch TV, do ANYTHING? Take care of myself? Finally move out of my parents' house again? Did they even give disability to twenty-eight-year-olds with a spotty employment record and kinda-bad-but-not-actually-gone vision?
The doctor didn't find any tearing or swelling. She couldn't even explain what exactly had caused my eye to hurt so bad. Later I read in one of those articles about keratoconus that I've read before but never fully absorbed that "random eye pain" can be a problem. So yeah. That's something I have now. Random eye pain. Awesome, huh?
I couldn't see very well for the rest of Monday. I called off my plans with friends, typed some blurry, angry posts on Facebook and Twitter. Panicking, freaking out the whole time.
Next day it had cleared up, pretty much. Back to where it was before. Which isn't good, but isn't as bad as it was Monday. My eyes suck, but I'm continuing to cope. The only way I could explain it to my friends and family was that Monday was a "bad eye day." Because that's something I have now. Bad eye days.
I've had keratoconus for a long time. I've never fully accepted the idea that I might someday be completely unable to see, though. It doesn't get that way for everyone. For most people, it just sort of reaches a certain plane and levels off. Most people can get along with glasses and contacts. I have been getting along for quite a long time, and I was hoping that I'd always be able to. Even though my left eye is a loss, my right eye was doing okay. Well enough. Not 20/20 even with correction, not anymore, probably not ever again. But working.
Having my good eye go out on me was... Well, it was horrifying.
I've never been so scared.
I'm magnifying the text on every screen I read now even more than I was before. I have the Windows setting at 150% for fonts and stuff. I quit reading books quite some time ago, because they're just not as fun when they're so hard to see. I can still blow up browser fonts enough to read there, though, so fanfic and online ebooks are my main entertainment now, as well as TV shows and little Facebook games. Work is...difficult, but I manage.
I have a bunch of writing projects, but every time I open the documents and look at all those words... typing and working with words just seems like such a difficult proposition anymore...
Anyway. I'm coping. That's all I can ask for, I guess.
And yeah. That's my life in the past little while.
'Kay, so I was homeschooled. I grew up conservative Christian. I'm Libertarian now, but those are my roots. Homeschooled kid in dreadlocks who is obviously Ryan Murphy's idea of a cool (if bizarre) version of Christianity? Down with it. Also down with the kid's decision at the end of the episode. I made the same one, after all.
Still can't help wondering if it's pandering, though. My current Libertarian self is kind of amazed that they didn't go the easy route and make him a snotty, cliched Christian antagonist for all the gay people on this show. (So many gay people on this show.) I'm truly impressed that they chose such an interesting characterization for a homeschooled character. He is apparently some sort of Christian-hippy Libertarian type, which I am down with. As mentioned. I'd be as smitten as Quinn is, truly.
But I'm glad my parents don't watch this show (as if they EVER would), because I know what it would look like to them. Another attempt to whitewash religious beliefs and never, ever have a Christian with any sort of firm convictions anywhere on TV. Which...he maybe sort of is. Accepting homosexuality is, of course, the "cool" thing to do.
Of course Glee would never take the braver, more interesting route of trying to create a sympathetic character who shows love to all those around him but also believes personally in a different morality. As most conservative Christians really, truly do, no matter what caricatures you've seen. My parents may never believe that homosexuality is not wrong, but they would also never condone bullying or abuse or even impoliteness to gay people, either. You'll never see a character like that, though, just either cool Christians who accept everything as easily as Joe did, or ugly, villainous Bible-thumpers who do their utmost to ruin everything for everyone. (Like, say, Quinn's dad.)
So, yeah. Conflicted. I accept that Glee is a leftist fairy tale. It has been from the first episode. But as always, it's when something rubs up against my personal experience that I get seriously uncomfortable. Despite where I am now, I remember where I've been, you know?
Rule of thumb should always be, though, to never, ever expect Glee to take anything but the easy road. That, too, has been true from day one.
RAISING HOPE.
Jimmy is such a sweetheart. Took 'em long enough, but they made it. ♥ I can't remember the last time I was so satisfied to see an on-screen kiss, if I ever was.
And Virginia and Burt and their search for a hobby was adorable and awesome. It was adorawesome. I was kind of hoping that their hobby would be always-looking-for-hobbies, because I wanted it to go on FOREVER.
Penelope Garcia... Just... Penelope Garcia. And Derek. You have me. Friendship or beyond. I'm with you all the way.
"PLANES CRASH." "AND APPARENTLY CLOWNS KILL." ♥
Good gravy and glory, but I'm glad Lori's gone. I wanted to like her, I want to like all characters on my shows, but I never did. She just... ugh. Block of wood. And it really showed up bad next to all of the other gorgeous, animated people on her "team." She might have been on the team, but she was never in their ohana. I just want to be sure that's clear. I sort of crazily loved that the episode ended with Steve kissing Catherine. They had more chemistry in their five scenes together than Steve and Lori ever had in all their episodes. Thank goodness TPTB caught on to this, and made it abundantly clear in that ending scene where Steve's affections lie (at least canonically. We all know who he REALLY loves).
I never wanted to be one of those fans who hated the new (or original) female character and ragged on her and hated her in every scene and fist-pumped when she left. I resisted being that fan with everything I had in me, I really did. I've never been that fan before. But I totally was with this character, on this show, and this is me fist-pumping up a storm. BYE, LORI. DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YA WHERE THE GOOD LORD SPLIT YA.
Also, Danny called Steve a "topper."
Oh, from the second to last episode? I want to point something out.
Ohana in concentric circles.
Also, I would like to point out that Danny's new family has GUNS. ::slow, Dean-like smile:: So any bad guys who want to mess with either of Danny's families would be well-advised to stay away.
I was viciously happy that Lori wasn't there for that scene. DANNY AND HIS OHANA. Also I thought Stan not being there was sort of symbolic, but that guy totally won me over forever, for good, when he said, "It's about Grace?" as if, yes, fine, Danny could shoot him, Danny could kill him, Danny could do whatever he had to do as long as it was about Grace, for Grace. That's a good daddy. Both of them.
Oh, Hawaii. How I wish to live on your tropical shores.
On a not-TV note, I had a scary experience this week. I've been noticing for awhile that my eyes seemed to be getting worse, but hadn't gone back to my eye doctor because there's not much they can do, you know? Keratoconus is keratoconus. My eyes are bad, they get worse, and probably someday my only option will be cornea transplants. Already my left eye is useless, with surgery being the only way to help out with that, but my right has been carrying the load. My right eye isn't great, either, but I've been coping. Well enough. I see multiple images all the time now, squint almost constantly when reading or working, and driving at night, is a seriously bad idea anymore. Like, a dangerously bad idea. Even in the day it's not the best idea, and I'm always super careful. But I was getting along.
Then on Monday morning I felt this incredibly bad pain in my right eye, and suddenly it wasn't seeing pretty much at all. I panicked. I panicked hard. My eye doctor told me long ago that if I ever felt a piercing pain in my eye, I should call them right away, since it might mean that the keratoconus had thinned my cornea enough to make it tear.
So yeah. Shaking and crying. At work. I called the eye place, all but crying on the phone. They said to come right over, they'd fit me in. My eyes were too blurry to see much at all. Called my mom to drive me there. So embarrassed and so scared. What if my eyes were like this from now on? What if I needed surgery? How was I going to work, write, watch TV, do ANYTHING? Take care of myself? Finally move out of my parents' house again? Did they even give disability to twenty-eight-year-olds with a spotty employment record and kinda-bad-but-not-actually-gone vision?
The doctor didn't find any tearing or swelling. She couldn't even explain what exactly had caused my eye to hurt so bad. Later I read in one of those articles about keratoconus that I've read before but never fully absorbed that "random eye pain" can be a problem. So yeah. That's something I have now. Random eye pain. Awesome, huh?
I couldn't see very well for the rest of Monday. I called off my plans with friends, typed some blurry, angry posts on Facebook and Twitter. Panicking, freaking out the whole time.
Next day it had cleared up, pretty much. Back to where it was before. Which isn't good, but isn't as bad as it was Monday. My eyes suck, but I'm continuing to cope. The only way I could explain it to my friends and family was that Monday was a "bad eye day." Because that's something I have now. Bad eye days.
I've had keratoconus for a long time. I've never fully accepted the idea that I might someday be completely unable to see, though. It doesn't get that way for everyone. For most people, it just sort of reaches a certain plane and levels off. Most people can get along with glasses and contacts. I have been getting along for quite a long time, and I was hoping that I'd always be able to. Even though my left eye is a loss, my right eye was doing okay. Well enough. Not 20/20 even with correction, not anymore, probably not ever again. But working.
Having my good eye go out on me was... Well, it was horrifying.
I've never been so scared.
I'm magnifying the text on every screen I read now even more than I was before. I have the Windows setting at 150% for fonts and stuff. I quit reading books quite some time ago, because they're just not as fun when they're so hard to see. I can still blow up browser fonts enough to read there, though, so fanfic and online ebooks are my main entertainment now, as well as TV shows and little Facebook games. Work is...difficult, but I manage.
I have a bunch of writing projects, but every time I open the documents and look at all those words... typing and working with words just seems like such a difficult proposition anymore...
Anyway. I'm coping. That's all I can ask for, I guess.
And yeah. That's my life in the past little while.